Leading With Love (Ministering to Children of Divorce)

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Leading With Love (Ministering to Children of Divorce)

The purpose of this group is to discuss issues related to divorce and ministering to children of divorce.  Let's work together to help these kids living through one of the most traumatic experiences they will ever live through.

Members: 37
Latest Activity: Apr 18, 2014

Discussion Forum

Story 4 Christmas in Divorced Homes

Started by Linda Ranson Jacobs Nov 12, 2011. 0 Replies

Just posted a story about Christmas in a divorced home. You can read it in a group at church or hand it to a parent and let them read in the comfort of their home. Custodial or non custodial parents…Continue

Tags: Christmas, divorce

writing a book about children of divorced parents

Started by Janet Baimbridge. Last reply by Linda Ranson Jacobs May 19, 2011. 1 Reply

Looking at this from a personal view and a church ministry leader view make sure the book includes living with a father and visiting the mother  and when the parents especially the one doesn't…Continue

Relational Environment

Started by Linda Ranson Jacobs. Last reply by Linda Ranson Jacobs May 16, 2011. 3 Replies

I have some definite ideas about setting up a relational environment for children of divorce. What do you think a  "relational environment" should encompass for these children?Continue

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Comment by Wanda Parker on February 3, 2012 at 5:39pm

Here is a link to a white paper in regard to children and divorce from Marriage and Religion Research Center

http://www.marri.us/effects-divorce-children

Comment by Linda Ranson Jacobs on December 24, 2011 at 3:34pm

Wanda, did you like the devotion? Just wondering.

Comment by Wanda Parker on December 24, 2011 at 11:28am
Comment by Stephen Grcevich, MD on June 16, 2011 at 9:02am

Allow me to add my two cents on the data looking at divorce in families of kids with special needs:

 

Special Needs and Divorce: What Does the Data Say?

 

Comment by Stephen Grcevich, MD on June 16, 2011 at 8:58am
Excellent thread...please let my crew at Key Ministry know if we can be of help.
Comment by Linda Ranson Jacobs on June 15, 2011 at 5:42pm

Wayne, I come across these kinds of articles all the time. I will make a conscious effort to pass them along to our team. 

 

Pray for us this weekend. This is the big move to Florida. Big giant life style change! 

Comment by Wayne Stocks on June 15, 2011 at 12:59pm
I was just reading that article - literally. :)  Thanks for posting it.
Comment by Linda Ranson Jacobs on June 15, 2011 at 12:53pm

Some new research shows children of divorce may have a shorter life span. Very interesting.

http://www.divorcereform.info/index.php/blog/CATHY-MEYER.html 

Comment by Ron Brooks on June 1, 2011 at 1:35pm
Thanks Linda....we did offer to let kids choose their grandma instead of mother, and we made some discs of the video for the kids to take home if their mom wasn't church.  We are trying to be sensitive, and doing some things right, but can always improve.  I just thought I would throw the thoughts out there to see if anyone had advice, and there are probably others in a similar situation.  Thanks!
Comment by Linda Ranson Jacobs on June 1, 2011 at 10:12am

Ron, thank you so much for thinking about this issue. Both Father's day and Mother's day can be difficult for some of these kids. And because kids don't want to be different, you may never know they are upset and feel left out. They will walk away in silence. 

 

This is a dilemma because we should teach kids to honor and celebrate their parents. I would encourage everyone to rethink how we celebrate and what we call different events. For example, if you host a special breakfast for the father's and sons for Father's day, perhaps you call it men and boys breakfast. Encourage the men of your church to ask a boy from a single parent mom home to be their adopted son that event. 

 

I used to host a "Mothers Day Tea" until I figured out it was sending one little girl off the wall. The event was for the daughters and their mothers. Every spring this little girl would start getting out of control, nasty and hateful. After Mother's Day she would calm back down. She lived with her dad so one year as an experiment we called it a "Someone I Love Day Tea" and told the girls they could invite anyone that help mother them. This little girl brought her dad. He was the only dad sitting in a room full of women and girls. But you should have seen the pride on that little girls face. She felt included. 

 

The main thing is to be sensitive to the kids who do not have a dad in the home or kids who live in a step family situation. You might form a mini focus group made up of some of the boys without dads and men who do not have custody of their children. See what suggestions they come up with.

 

If you should make another video, it might mean being straight up with some of the kids about their situation. Don't ignore the fact there is no dad in the home. Reword the instructions for these kids to include a special man that has influenced them such as a grandfather or elder in the church. If their dad doesn't attend church with them, make copies of the video and asked if the child hand would like to hand deliver it to their dad. 

 

Please share what you decide to do this year. 

 

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